Valentine’s Day is a date reserved for romance, but for some, the shmaltzy, saccharine tone of the holiday can be too much. The roses, the chocolates and the heart-shaped everything are all impersonal and cliché, not to mention expensive.
This Valentine’s Day, instead of the same old impersonal trinkets, get something that really speaks to the horror lover in your life, even if it’s only you. We’ve plumbed the depths of Etsy to find the best unique gifts that express a darker side of the day of love.
So whether you’re harbouring some anti-Valentines sentiments or just happen to show your love through more macabre means than most, take a look at some unusual gifts that put a truly unique spin on the occasion.
A simple card is the easiest way to show you care, and probably the easiest gift to infuse with personality.
DoodleDojo is run by an art school grad and all around sci-fi lover and specialises in hand-drawn, geeky artwork. The store has a ton of Valentine’s-ready horror and sci-fi cards bursting with pun potential that’s surprisingly non-groanworthy.
From The Thing to Evil Dead, there’s a card for every type and level of horror fandom. Your typical card costs £2.65, with shipping speedy enough that there’s still time to pick up a last-minute card.
Whatever present you’ve found for your valentine, you’ll need a box to store it in. Even if you’re going down a more traditionally romantic gift avenue, your choice of box is a good opportunity to deviate from the norm and shake things up a bit.
BoxedbyClaire has got you covered with their heart adorned coffin box. Specialising in marzipan treats and custom-made boxes to fit them, BoxedbyClaire is taking this year’s Valentines celebration in a more gothic direction.
Handmade out of sturdy 300gsm and covered in tiny crimson hearts, the petite casket measures 16cm by 8.5cm and costs only £2.50 for one. It’s the perfect size for smaller gifts like sweets, or simply a useful coffin-shaped box on its own.
If you’re after something little bigger and a lot theatrical, you can also pick up the 30cm by 20cm coffin, priced at £34.99, which comes filled with five black roses.
Jason Voorhees Chocolates
Now you’ve got your box, it’s time to fill it, and what better twist on cliché candy than chocolates in shape of a fictional serial killer’s face? These Friday the 13th chocolates come from SweetBelleCakes, a bakery dedicated to novelty and custom made sweets and decorations.
A set of eight little hockey masks is £9.57 – they come individually wrapped and heat sealed to withstand shipping. You can take your pick of white, dark or milk chocolate, as well as flavours like mint, candy-cane and cookies and cream.
Why spend a night on the town when you can stay in and ah’legeth ot fhtagn R’lyeh? For the Lovecraft lover in your life, look no further than this nifty Cthulhu mug.
From horror T-shirt and mug specialists merchmassacre, this porcelain mug is £8.02 and has a capacity of 12 fluid ounces. The vinyl design is handmade and stars everyone’s favourite Great Old One in a Valentine’s-appropriate heart.
The shop actually has two different designs: one features a much cuter, almost chibi-esque Cthulhu, while the other has a more imposing, more tentacle-y version of the cosmic deity.
In preparation for Valentine’s night, you might be tempted to go out and buy undies – red lingerie, some silk boxers perhaps. Instead, try something a little more risqué like these snarling Pinhead briefs.
At £20.87, these briefs are sold by thegeekgarden and are available for both men and women – a nice change of pace for novelty underwear. Their collection of pants feature a velvet front and emblazoned back, with women’s sizes spanning from XS to 3XL.
Their eccentric Etsy store sells a wide variety of clothing inspired by film and TV, including Hellraiser, IT and A Nightmare on Elm Street, as well as lighter fare like Beetlejuice and The Nightmare Before Christmas.
Human Heart Soap
What better way to show you treasure someone’s heart than by… rubbing it into your skin? These black, anatomically correct heart-shaped soaps come from ParanormalBathtivity and are handmade from goat’s milk, coconut oil and the decidedly creepy-sounding Thieves oil.
Chosen for its grim history(of being used by grave robbers in the 1400s to supposedly ward off the Black Plague), Thieves oil is a blend of clove bud, lemon peel, cinnamon bark, rosemary and eucalyptus oils.
The hearts come in their own black coffin-shaped box, and £10.43 for a set of three should ensure you stay clean and plague-free for at least a good few months.
Turn your favourite film into an ambient night light with a VHS tape lamp. VHS lamps are a fun way to honour your favourite movie while also setting up some serious mood lighting.
Although they’re now a trend, NancysJars is the self-proclaimed original VHS lamp shop on Etsy, selling retro lights in a huge array of films. But by far, they have the biggest selection of horror films, with over a hundred movies to choose from.
A tape can cost anywhere from £14.99 to £22.99. Battery-powered and made with heat-safe LEDs, these tapes can free-stand or hang on the wall and also come with your choice of light colour.